What goes up must come down

[galen_erso]

Climbing down is often more difficult and dangerous than going up; you follow gravity, but not too much. Too much would be deadly.

In the morning, Bodhi and Galen had started out with Bodhi's personal possessions in backpacks, and the most valuable and important cargo on anti-gravity floaters. Much of the way, they had been reppelling down ropes.

Now, they are taking a break in sight of the base, but still quite far away.

"We should do something about rope burns," Galen says.

Comments

[imthepilot]

"Or bring better gloves next time." Bodhi points out, flexing his aching hands. He ties off the antigrav crates, following them down like a string of balloons.

Sadly a lot of him is aching as the medic's numbing agent wears off.

[galen_erso]

"Take off the gloves and give me your hands" Galen says, getting a small dented tin from his pocket. "Lyra used to deserve by this to keep calluses from breaking open and bleeding, which was always a danger for the kind of people she used to take on expeditions."

[imthepilot]

Bodhi rips the wrist closure open and peels off the gloves. It's not too bad, not blistered yet but red and sore. He holds his hands out to Galen, the hickey on his wrist peeking out of his sleeve.

[galen_erso]

Galen takes off his own gloves, and takes the hand with the marked wrist in his own. From the tin, he takes a small piece of freshly smelling wax and starts rubbing it over the reddened spots on Bodhi's palms.

[imthepilot]

"Lyra's trick?" He asks softly, not sure if it was something Galen would want to talk about.

[galen_erso]

"I learned about this from her," Galen nods, carefully ministering to Bodhi's hands, "but she assured me every climber used something similar, because bloody hands are not helpful."

Pause.

"Or raw, red ones. It's always better to have a good grip and feel confident in one's body."

[imthepilot]

Bodhi curls his fingers around Galen's, stroking the back of his hand a little. "She sounds like someone always boldly charging ahead. Someone worth pushing yourself to follow."

[galen_erso]

"Yes, Bodhi, that is exactly what she was," Galen says, hand closing around Bodhi's. "Many people didn't get what we were like, the famous scientist and his wife, but really, she was the strong one, between us. Krennic of course never understood her."

Pause.

"But you do."

[imthepilot]

"There are people who make us want to be better. Not by disapproving or being critical. Just because they're them and you want them to smile. My grandmother was like that." He cups Galen's cheek. "Is it okay that I ask about her?"

[galen_erso]

"It is," Galen says. "It has been fifteen years. I am mostly grateful to have known her, now, even though I still miss her at odd times. What bitterness remains is all for Krennic and his chokehold on me."

[imthepilot]

"Tell me how I can help?" He takes Galen's hands in his. "I may be a pilot without a ship but that won't last for long."

[galen_erso]

"Bodhi," Galen says, lifting their joined hands to kiss Bodhi's knuckles. "Now I have you to live up to for. You are a pilot without a ship, but you'd somehow take on Orson Krennic."

Pause.

"You are amazingly brave, you know? Not like me. I've allowed my research to be abused by the Empire to build a super-weapon that can destroy entire planets. That is what we are doing here, this important and top secret research. And what's worst, we are using kyber to power it."

There it is, the worst, out in the open.

[imthepilot]

Bodhi was about to protest that he's not brave. That he wouldn't fight but take Galen and run, as far as they needed to run to out run Krennic.

But then Galen keeps talking. He looks like a landed fish for a moment, his mouth open wide.

But then he shakes himself and pulls Galen into his arms, hugging him tightly. They killed his wife, took him away from his child. And now this. To make Galen responsible for such brutal madness.

To make Bodhi reasonable too. He aided them, carried the kyber here, with Jedhean blood on it.

He holds Galen tight, letting the horror of it sink in.

[galen_erso]

Galen clings to him.

"That is what the empire really is," he says quietly. "Not their silly overdramatic damaged Sith lord, not their aspiration to an order so perfect not a boot can be lost -- this is it. Wholesale destruction and total contempt for life, total contempt for the Force. But every one of their 'little cogs' is a person. You, or me, or any random Stormtrooper."

[imthepilot]

"Cogs in their murder machine." Bodhi whispers, his voice rough with guilt and anger and fear.

[galen_erso]

"That is what we are to them," Galen says, still clinging to him. "But still, the Force will find a way..."

[imthepilot]

Galen has more faith in the Force than Bodhi does. But that's one of the things he loves about Galen.

He strokes Galen's back, just holding him and kissing his hair. "We'll find a way." A way to live.

[galen_erso]

"To get away, and to do something about the murder machine," Galen says. "It has its weaknesses."

[imthepilot]

Bodhi nods and strokes Galen's cheek, pushing his hair back from his face. "Is it something we can exploit?"

[galen_erso]

"Yes," Galen says. "Or rather, the rebels can. And the Force gave you that straight connection to Saw Herrera and my Jyn, even if it's barred by angry brothers. So yes, we can. Bring that thing down, free ourselves, finally find a way to use my technology for good."

[imthepilot]

"You'll have to come with me." Bodhi urges. "The imperial navy is scowling Jedha for him. If I go looking too, the empire will know." He'll have to defect. It's the only way.

[galen_erso]

Galen clings.

"We should not decide anything yet," he says. "If I go missing, Krennic will scour the universe for me. Not just Jedha. But yes, I am ready to go with you. You are what I had been waiting for all these years -- and so much more!"

He looks at Bodhi's face, maroon eyes shimmering. "My lovely Bodhi. My pilot."

[imthepilot]

Bodhi kisses him deeply. Because words are too complicated, too small for everything he feels.

[galen_erso]

Galen kisses him back, just as deeply, having run out of words as well.

Everything he hoped and doubted and pondered and dreamed has come to a head in this one lovely man in his arms. A way out, a way to make right the wrongs he was made to do, a way back to his Jyn, even a way to finally make Lyra's death count fully.

And then, a chance to love and happiness and good work into the bargain, when all else is done.

[imthepilot]

Bodhi doesn't break the kiss till there's no air left in his lungs.

He presses his forehead to Galen's, his mind already on the practical. "I'll submit the damage report on the ship as soon as we get back. The navy can rule on what happens to it sooner rather than later. With luck, there's be a new ship waiting for me when my medical leave ends. From there, we can plan."

[galen_erso]

"With your ship, we have wings, even if it looks more like a turtle," Galen says. "However, nobody takes any notice of these things. That is the advantage of a good bureaucracy -- with the right codes, you get where you need to be."

[imthepilot]

"I'll reach out to my brothers next time I'm on Jedha. Face to face will be painful but safer." After all, he can ask for leave to visit family. And after saving the chief scientist's life, surely they'll let him.

[galen_erso]

"Yes," Galen says. "With that last little step covered in secret, we really do have all we need to break free."

He leans in for another kiss.

[imthepilot]

Bodhi kisses back. It's dangerous and terrifying. The risk they will both be taking could easily be fatal for them both. But the reward.

A thought catches him out, his self doubt milling. "Your daughter, she might now be glad, to meet me."

[galen_erso]

"My daughter hasn't seen me in almost sixteen years," Galen says, "and has been raised by rebels. When we are done with all the matters of life and death and galactic importance, we can tell her in good time, and I'm sure she will accept us."

[imthepilot]

Bodhi nods and tries to put the thought aside. Things rarely work out that simple in his experience. The Empire don't outright forbid relations between men, at least at Bodhi's level, but it is a cultural taboo in ways it never was on Jedha. He's use to having to hide, to settle for semi-anonymous fumbles. But he doesn't want to hide loving Galen forever. Not once they're free.

[galen_erso]

Galen pulls him close and holds him, feeling Bodhi's doubt and pain in the silence. Where one of them is certain, the other is afraid -- where one needs support, the other is strong.

"We are made for each other," he murmurs, "so yes, we will claim it, in good new civilised times, and not hide loving each other."

[imthepilot]

Bodhi buries his face in Galen's neck, feeling the warmth and promise in his voice. "I love you, Galen. With all my heart. And I'll do whatever it takes to be with you." Not matter what it costs them.

[galen_erso]

"We will have to shift the entire galaxy to be free," Galen whispers into Bodhi's hair, "but we'll get there. And I'm a scientist. I know how leverage works."

[imthepilot]

"And as a pilot I know how to plan." Bodhi answers in turn, kissing Galen's hair. "We'll work out what he need and how to get it before we act."

[galen_erso]

"We will," Galen says. "That is a promise."

He leans into Bodhi's warmth, sighing deeply. Everything is still painful and difficult, but finally, there is hope again.

[imthepilot]

Bodhi strokes Galen's back, eyes closed and already mentally searching through his contacts. Who can get the codes, who can set them up where. He tries to still his spinning gears by leaning back to kiss Galen.

[galen_erso]

"You make me strong," Galen says softly, "and I make you strong. That is as it should be."

He follows this with another kiss.

[imthepilot]

Bodhi knows he isn't brave but he is good at planning. They'll look after each other.

He cups Galen's cheek, hugging him again. "Just two little pebbles against the Empire."

[galen_erso]

Galen kisses him, slow and lovingly.

"Two necessary pebbles just where they should be, the Force swirling along them just so," he says. "We can do it."

[imthepilot]

Bodhi takes Galen's hand and guides them to sit in the edge of next decent.

It like a good spot to stop and collect their thoughts. Exactly where they are - on the edge of a cliff facing a frightening and deep future.

He leans his head on Galen's shoulder, fingers entwined. "We can do it." He echoes softly. They still had two weeks. Two weeks to be themselves before jumping off their metaphoric cliff. Two weeks to plan the way down.